Archive for January, 2008
What is it about doing the right thing that is so difficult? I’m sitting here looking over the steps I need to take to change my world (because I WANT to change my world) and I trip all over number 5 – self-discipline. I don’t even like having to discipline others so how am I suppose to discipline myself?
The bible study I receive each morning on my email just came. The title is “Just Do It.” The irony is not lost on me. I can whine and complain about how difficult it all is and how unfair it can be. The truth is that I just have to do what I need to do and quit my belly aching.
Maybe that is all that self-discipline is really. The idea that I need to just do it even when I don’t want to do it is almost too simple to make sense. I say it to myself, my friends, and my children at least once every day: It all comes back to me.
There is no magic pill that will make me fit and trim as long as I continue to eat outside of hunger and satisfaction. Money is not going to suddenly appear in my account as long as I’m sitting on the couch flipping through old and worthless television programs. The house will not shack itself into clean and organized no matter how hard I wish as long as I’m avoiding the chores like the plague.
I AM responsible for where I am and what I am becoming.
And now I am right back to the self-discipline. I know what I need to do and I even know HOW to do it but I just can’t seem to get myself to do it (at least not consistently). If discipline is about training in rules and pushing others then self-discipline must be about pushing me into action even when I don’t want to go there.
I was almost a high school athlete. Sports were something I enjoyed, but I was not interested in dedicating the time and energy necessary to become proficient in any of them. I played and was even somewhat good at some of them. My younger brother was great. Even at just 5’6” he played basketball at such a level that he received a college scholarship (even over his other classmates that stood way over him). Everyday, he dedicated time, thought, and energy to improving his game.
His mindset was to be the best. It was all about the positives in and around his life. He didn’t complain because he wasn’t as tall as the other players – he just worked on his vertical leap so that he could jump higher then they could.
Some ideas are coming to my mind about how I can find self-discipline for my life and ultimately bring success as well.
1. Set a weekly goal for improvement – just one. Work at it until I do it without thought.
2. Plan a reward for when I accomplish a task. Get a new outfit when I drop 15 lbs.
3. Take away the distractions. This is where self-discipline is going to get tough for me. It’s easier for me to get myself to do something I need to do when I’m not busy doing what I shouldn’t be doing. It’s time to cut out the television (or at least limit it each week).
Just three little steps should be all it takes for me to be able to push ME where I want to be.
January 29th, 2008
Very few writer’s have stable incomes – the kind where they get a specific amount every week or every month. Instead, the income is based on the number of articles that are written and sold (and sometimes when those articles are printed). It is still possible to budget for such and uncertain amount of money.
1. Establish an emergency savings account. Before you dive into a full time career as a writer, you have to set back some income. You want at least three months of must pays (mortgage, utilities and insurance) set aside for any months where the paychecks are lean.
2. Get a month ahead. You want to have next month’s money in your checking account today. Instead of paying your bills from the paychecks you are getting in, those monies will go to restore the reserves in your account (this is separate money from what is in savings).
3. Set you budget so you know what income goal you must reach. Be sure to include savings AND taxes (about 28%) in your figures. Once you reach that income goal consistently for six months you are ready to be a full time writer.
4. Cut back on your unnecessary spending. It may be easier to go to the local burger place and get supper, but it will cost less if you take that 30 minutes and fix a meal.
5. Save the bonuses. Any thing that you make over you monthly needs should be placed in your emergency savings account.
Making a regular income from any freelance job is not easy. At times it can be scary – because the check might be in the mail, but you don’t know when it’s going to arrive. You have to plan for the lean times and aim for the high times. Hard work, persistence, and a thrifty nature will help you reach your personal, financial, and literary goals.
January 24th, 2008
Telling your children what they need to know for a successful and happy life means nothing if your actions don’t back it up. The whole idea of “do what I say, not what I do” is insane. Children are more apt to follow your lead then they are to follow you advice.
This has been on my heart for the last 24 hours because of an incident my family experience. We were at the park playing and there was new equipment being installed. The workers told us we could play on the old equipment as long as we stayed away from the area they were working.
The kids (and parents) were having a great time. We all made a point to give a wide berth to the work area. Later, the workers wrapped the new equipment with caution tape and packed up their tools. We continued to go around the area – there was still plenty for the children to do.
Some other mothers walked up with their children and we shared what the workers had told us. They were disappointed – so much so that they just let their children walk up under the tape and play on the equipment any way.
My middle child came over and asked me if they didn’t see the caution tape. I assured him that they did. My oldest son went over to explain to the ladies that there was tape up and it wasn’t a good idea to be up there (he has a heart of compassion and was worried about the little children). I was just thankful we were almost ready to go.
Our group gathered for lunch, and just as we were finishing, another family showed up. I shared the information with them as well, and they immediately told the children to stay away from that area.
Later that night I was talking to one of the employees of the department and she said the equipment wasn’t safe yet. There was an actually reason for that caution tape to be up – it wasn’t just to torture those who wanted to go play.
All night I wondered how often those mothers thought the rules didn’t apply to them. I thought about the children and how they would soon understand that what they wanted was more important than what was right.
At the same time, I had a warm feeling about my children’s own future. The incident made me glad that we are following the rules no matter what others around us might be doing. Our children are learning to do what is right, and that makes us the ultimate winners.
January 19th, 2008
Great, unique and interesting stories are the life blood on any freelance writer. Working online, putting out 10 or 20 articles a day, it is easy to see how your idea well can dry up. When you get all dried up for article ideas, here are some ways to prime the pump.
Read other magazines that relate to your field. Jot down in phrases or ideas that you find particularly appealing. From you list you can start to create punchy titles and complete the circle by adding a break down of five to ten points you want to cover in the article.
Review your older articles. First, you writing will have improved since you wrote your older material and you may be able to find a better way to approach some of the article ideas. Second, you may notice a trend in your writing that you missed before. This alone could spark some ideas around your lifestyle, plans, or success. And third, but not least, you may discover some unpublished pieces that you can polish up for publications.
Make a list of topics that you deal with each day. Choose the ones that you want to know more about and do some research. Let that research be the beginning of your article. Repeat the process until you know all there is to know about everything.
Scan the internet for websites that deal with issues you prefer to deal with. Read what other blogs or sites are writing about and let their ideas ignite your own creativity. NEVER copy articles from a website or other publication – this is stealing. Instead of taking their words, let their words inspire you to create your own.
Eaves drop on people during your day. In waiting rooms, restaurants, and even the grocery store people talk openly (and sometimes loudly) about every thing under the sun. Let their words inspire your writing (even if it’s only an article about conversational etiquette).
You are surrounded by great ideas every day. The key is harvesting those ideas and then forming them into coherent articles. Keep a notebook handy, jot down phrases or titles as they come to your mind, and be sure to add a few points that you would want to cover in the article. You will find that your well mostly likely will never run dry again.
January 16th, 2008
My husband has always made me wonder – just a little, in the back of my mind. Something just wasn’t quite right. For fourteen years I have suspected, but now I know the truth. My husband is a thief. Last night (actually early this morning), I caught him.
The really sly thing (and probably one of the reasons I haven’t been able to catch him red-handed) is that he doesn’t take it all at one. It’s just a little here and a little there so that no one notices. The few times I have mentioned it in the past, he’s always changed the subject and usually suggested it was something I did myself.
This morning, it happened again. I put everything right and dosed back to sleep. It wasn’t too long until everything was out of balance once again. I am a light sleeper and I notice these things. My husband is like a parrot – so long as it is dark (or you cover his head) he can sleep. But the truth can no longer be denied.
My husband is a sheet-stealer and his victim is MY covers.
Fourteen years he has had me convinced that I was “kicking” the covers off in his direction. It’s not like I haven’t kicked things off the bed before. I regularly kick his cat across the room at night – she has a fetish for my feet.
I’ve got him now, though. Not that I think he will actually admit to being a sheet-stealer. He’d sooner admit that I actually was right most of the time (and we all know that AIN’T about to happen). No, he’ll try to turn the table and make me out to be the bad guy. But I know the truth; of course the truth won’t keep me warm on a cold winter’s night.
Instead of confronting him, I think I will just plan for the inevitable. I can store an extra blanket next to my side of the bed or maybe even make the bed with two separate top covers. On the rare occasion that he makes the bed up, I can then calmly explain that it was the only way I knew how to curb his night time desires. Even if is doesn’t buy it, I’ll finally be warm through the night.
January 12th, 2008
If you could plant subliminal messages in your mind that would help you achieve success, would you do it? The power of suggestion is an incredible tool that most of us never utilize on our own minds. Even more of us use it without even knowing it.
Take the athlete (casual or professional). The coach will constantly tell them to push their talents. “You can do it.” And the athlete will tell himself “I can do it.” Before long, the athlete is doing it. Granted, he did put in hours of work to get there, but the mind helped.
Look at the business tycoon. She tells herself she is going to be successful. “I will have my own company.” She has people around her to encourage her and support her goals, “You will make it.” Eventually, she makes it. There may have been some stumbles along the way, but she pushed through in the end.
The power of words is beyond belief. The Bible mentions the tongue (and the power it holds) almost as often as all other subjects. What you say can deeply impact your ability to accomplish your life goals. It has a way of burying in your subconscious and dictating your path.
Make your mind work for you. After all, a mind is a terrible thing to waste 
.
1. Set your goal – whether it is weight loss, literary success, or just home organization.
2. See your goal – picture the finished product in your mind until you can SEE it.
3. Say your goal – repeat your goal first thing in the morning and last thing at night three times – with gusto!
Don’t sit around and wait for the magic to happen. Get out there and put action behind your words. Not only will success be close behind, but you may just find yourself enjoying life a little more than before.
January 11th, 2008
It’s time I started a happy journal. There needs to be a place where I record all of my blessings for the day – no matter how big or how small. Like the time I was going to eat some cookies (even though I had just finished lunch and WASN’T hungry) and the phone rang. Instead of eating, I spent 10 minutes listening to a lady explain how God wanted to use her in this community. I did not go back to the cookies.
There was a time when I would jot these things down in my prayer journal, but they seem to get lost in my whining 
, and besides, it was usually on the great big blessings that I even bothered to write down.
While I’m out running errands today, I’m going to stop at the office supply store and get me a new journal. Every night before I go to sleep I will take a few minutes to jot down all the nice things and wonderful blessings that happened that day (like the kids cleaning up with out being asked or the hubby doing the dishes without complaining or the amazing sunset).
The great thing about keeping all of my happy moments together is that they will be easy to reference when things are hard. Despite all of my positive mental attitude and happy go lucky nature, I still have days when I just don’t want to do anything but be. Having a happy journal could be the jolt I need to get me back on the track to success.
January 10th, 2008
Something peculiar has happened at my home. Here we are in day nine of the New Year and I’m still focused on the goals I set at the end of last year. Wow! I’ve even managed to accomplish one of them (finished my synopsis even though it still needs some serious tweaking).
One of the biggest differences for me between this year and all of the rest is that I have the goals sitting next to my desk. I look at them every single day – lots of times! And I’ve shared them with friends and strangers alike. This year I have cried out for some accountability. Sometimes it is the only thing that pushes us on.
On the other side of my desk I have posted the “17 Steps to Change Your World” listed in the book I’m reading. It is these steps that are the forces I’m using to help me push my way to completing each and every one of my goals. Some days I actually read through the whole list (I need the extra boost to get going). On other days, it is one step that will jump out from the rest.
Today number three (going the extra mile) is what is motivating me forward. It would have been easy to just turn off the computer, crawl into bed and call it a night. That was actually my plan. I took a moment to look at my website and was discussing the numbers with a friend when it dawned on me that someone was coming to my site right now to read a bit of fun or wisdom or insight and I hadn’t bothered to jot anything down. That’s just not right.
While it would be great to have the kind of numbers that draws a 5-figure income - who in their right mind would turn down that kind of paycheck – that is not my driving force. Sharing and caring and venting are what this site is really about. I want to help others reach their goals as much as I want to reach my won. Just knowing that one woman might read my tale and have a better day for it as valuable to me as that giant paycheck (and I’m writing that with a straight face). There is a reason for everything and I know there is a reason for my writing, even if I don’t fully understand just yet.
I should add one more item to my New Year’s goal list. I want to make my website one that inspires, encourages, and lifts up everyone who stops by for a visit. I think I finally understand that it is not the numbers that matter. It is the people that really count.
January 9th, 2008
There are few people who truly DON’T want to succeed in life. Most of the people I know that aren’t successful are there because of choices they make. If you want to make things happen in your life, you have to be ready to put something into it.
Think Positive Things
Someone once told me a story about a POW who never played golf in his life, but while he was captive he would play in his mind every day. He pictured how to swing the club and imagined the feel of the ball as it connected with the perfect swing. When he was finally freed, one of the first things he did was go play a real game of golf. His first game through he shot a 74. He had pictured the game in his mind so many times that it became a reality. Think yourself to success.
Know What You are Striving For
You have to be focused to be successful. Changing your vision every day only leaves you confused and probably confuses the ones around you who want to be supportive. There must be a definite goal in mind in order for you to reach your destination. You can’t take a trip without knowing where you are going – or else you will spend a lot of time, gas, and money trying to get to no where in particular.
Get Going
Action is required for every success to come to life. No amount of dreaming will take you anywhere if you don’t put your dream into action. That means that if you want to be a successful writer you MUST write and then you must send your writing to everyone! If you want to start a business, you must make a plan and put it into action. Things must be done in order for things to get done!
Accurate Thinking
Being successful means knowing the truth. There are things I would have loved to accomplish in my life, but they are not where my gifts and talents lie. Being a dancer was a childhood fantasy (except that I’m only 5” tall and have more curves than an on-ramp in LA). I still dance for fun, but that’s as far as it goes. You have to know the truth about your dreams and be willing to accept the things that you CAN NOT change. Here’s a hint: If you don’t know for sure, then ask someone you can trust (or try out for American Idol ).
There are so many ways to be successful in life – and a big part of it depends on what you consider successful. No matter what you want to be or where you want to go, you must have a positive attitude about life, you must know what success means to you, you must put action to your dreams, and you must live in reality when it comes to those dreams. Your success lies in your hands. What are you going to do with it?
January 7th, 2008
I can not put off until tomorrow what I need to do today because tomorrow will have enough of its own without me having to play catch up. It doesn’t matter how quiet my day is suppose to be. With three boys, three dogs, three cats, and one husband, every day has something going on.
The question I am often faced with is how do I get motivated when my body, mind, or very being is too tired to go?
Just do one thing. Sometimes it motivates me enough to do one thing more and then one thing more . . . and so on. Sometimes I only get ONE thing done, but it is one more than I would have gotten done other wise.
Read, listen to or watch something inspirational. Seeing other people get there house clean and organized or reading about how people over come adversity often gets my juices pumping. One note of warning (at least in my life): This does NOT work exercise. I can sit and watch “Biggest Loser” while eating cookies and milk and not even feel a tinge of guilt. It does take practice, though .
Take a long hot bath or a long walk. Get away from the things you need to do and just relax for a little while. Take the family along. Maybe they will be the inspiration you need (unless they are the distraction you are trying to get away from in the first place).
Get your mind right. As long as I stay focused on what ever negative is affecting me (hormones, a sick tummy, or not enough sleep) I will continue to be down. Negative thoughts will birth negative results! ALWAYS. Think happy thoughts. Peter was right – they are what make you fly.
Motivation is not always easy to find. Some times it is elusive enough to evade me for the whole day (especially when I don’t try to find it). But if I am willing to put in a little effort then I will get something done before the day is over.
January 4th, 2008
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